We’ve all been there. A person comes in, and you think: “Here we go. Again.” Or maybe you were the person who came in and made everyone breathe a collective sigh of resignation.
It is absolutely outrageous that the university expects us to go through the arduous task of putting one foot in front of the other for longer than five total minutes to get to a class.
You see, I get not one, but two showers per day. After I wash with my usual soap and water, I get out, dry off and receive my second shower — this time, from the ceiling — and I know that I’ll never even look at dirt again.
I stare at my phone. A scrawny, pre-pubescent boy with matted blond hair and a nylon sweatshirt moves across the screen. A loud, drawling wail oscillating to the beat of snapping fingers comes from my screen.
I’m sure that if you took all the smarts lost by Fordham University students and combined them together, you would get a larger-than-average brain. A big brain, if you will.
After being forced to live in this godforsaken country for two months, it is clear the government here does not know how to manage their money. I have seen the effects first hand: healthier people, a cleaner environment and less debt. As an American, it baffles me.
President Rev. Joseph M. McShane, S.J., spontaneously decided we needed more monogrammed cups and needed to find money in the budget. But in return for this noble sacrifice, Fordham will be equipping every student with a spatula, a personalized chef’s apron and a complimentary floor cleaning kit.
When I saw a McMahon bulletin board advertising an upcoming spirit week, I thought things would be different this time. Each day promised new events. It was the culmination of a whole month of “giving it up” for something, apparently.
Recently, it came to my attention that I am broke. New York is expensive and I was never that rich in the first place, so things have only gone downhill upon my arrival at Lincoln Center in September.
