Everyone wants to be a kid. No responsibilities, no stress — not true, but Gen Z nostalgia could convince me otherwise. The second youngest generation is already missing the good old days, including even the worst days of COVID lockdowns. But while longing for the past obviously isn’t exclusive to young people, our generation has shifted nostalgia into something more.
It’s no longer just about aesthetics, music or wonder; young people are nostalgic for the helplessness of childhood. When you can’t get a job, rent an apartment or know what the future will bring, it’s nice to remember a time when those expectations didn’t exist. It’s even nicer to reject those expectations altogether.
This rejection of adulthood can be seen in many ways, the most common being humor. Images comparing our generation to our parents, relatable adult-life TikToks and the “I’m just a girl” trend, for example, are all indicative of a self-inflicted helplessness among young people.
While this helplessness presents as classic self-deprecating humor, it is very different from trends like millennial “adulting.” Whereas millennials made fun of their incompetence at “adult” tasks, Gen Z is entrenched in our refusal; not “I don’t know how,” but “I can’t and won’t.” Young people are rejecting adulthood before it can reject them.
A tumultuous political environment, economically unstable nation and worsening climate all contribute to a pessimistic outlook by those my age.
In recent years, the job market has been on a steep decline, worsening significantly as 2026 begins. This is particularly true for young people struggling to get internships and first jobs after graduating from college. In September of 2025, the unemployment rate among recent college graduates was 5.8%, the highest since 2021; the underemployment rate rose even further to 41.8%. If that was September of last year, you can imagine how much worse things are now.
In 2026, hiring inflows for workers under 25 have gone down by 45% since 2023. The share of workers under 25 has been declining rapidly, even as highly qualified workers struggle in the job market.
I don’t bring up these statistics to fearmonger, but to provide context for why so many young people infantilize themselves. While much of Gen Z’s helplessness is self-imposed, it is also a reasonable response to a bleak-looking future. A tumultuous political environment, economically unstable nation and worsening climate all contribute to a pessimistic outlook by those my age.
Moreover, poor job prospects prevent young adults from reaching financial independence and living on their own. With New York City rent prices, the only two options appear to be living with parents or packing a too-small apartment with roommates. Without the space to discover themselves independently, it is especially difficult for young people to develop into adulthood. Employment and independent housing are only two of many adult achievements Gen Z cannot reach. The compounding effect of these missed milestones only encourages young people to turtle further into childhood.
There is something to be said of the idea that traditional markers of adulthood — moving out, living independently and a lucrative career — are arbitrary. However, I don’t think that these milestones are necessary to live a meaningful adult life. In fact, some of Gen Z’s rejection of traditional adult expectations can also be a useful questioning of the established norms of adulthood. However, most of the time, I think that young people’s helplessness is more detrimental than useful. By and large, we are still interested in all of these things; we’re just unsure if we can have them.
When, two months ago, I canceled my doctor’s appointment last minute and pretended I didn’t get the voicemail to reschedule; or, throughout the past year, pathologically avoided attending Fordham career events; or decided I didn’t actually need to memorize my social security number — that was not an act of rebellion. It was childish helplessness used as an excuse not to do any better. The real problem with Gen Z’s self-infantilization is that it becomes our reason not to grow into adults at all. It convinces us that we can’t, rather than won’t.
When adulthood becomes an unattainable goal, childhood can feel like a safe haven. But in reality, the self-infantilization of Gen Z is only another form of larger cultural apathy. In this case, helplessness combines an inability to hope for the future with a desperate longing for the past. In Neverland, we don’t have to think about the job market or cost of living; we can just be kids like back when things were, for us, so simple.
Caring for others is an emotional burden, but one that is equally as gratifying as it is necessary.
The tangible consequences of this immaturity are a society of young people who lack basic social and life skills. Make no mistake, I’m not a grandpa, and this isn’t Christmas dinner — I don’t think knowing how to use a typewriter or rotary phone are very useful skills (and I can’t use them either). But opening a bank account? Initiating difficult conversations with friends and loved ones? Calling the doctor’s office back after two months without eschewing it as “too awkward”? These are not arbitrary milestones, but basic skills anyone who can legally drive should know.
Furthermore, self-infantilization makes us less considerate of ourselves and others. Children are not as experienced, and so aren’t expected to be as kind or thoughtful as older adolescents and adults. However, when young people adopt a helpless attitude, we often leave these positive traits behind. Caring for others is an emotional burden, but one that is equally as gratifying as it is necessary. Without care, we become solely focused on our needs.
This attitude is evident in snark. I feel, at least, that people my age are extremely quick to judge themselves and others. Be it someone too sincere, too fake, a “pick me” or otherwise annoying, we are always looking to find someone’s insecurity and make fun of it. I fall into this too; I often say something snarky I don’t even believe, just as a joke. But while these comments we all make might be entertaining from a precocious kid, we need to remind ourselves who we are now. We are, more or less, adults, and we have to treat others with maturity.
Even when it feels good, helplessness won’t get us anywhere useful. I don’t think growing up means the end of childhood wonder, asking others for help or even living with your parents (not in this economy). The real important part of adulthood is responsibility and independence — scary, certainly, but necessary to move past what once was. In Neverland, you’ll be happy for a while, but soon, longing for the past will turn into regret for a missed future. That means, sooner or later, it’s time to start growing up.
