If you’ve ever had a group of college-aged girlfriends, you know that two subjects might be intrinsically linked: disappointing men and their zodiac signs. Your friends have a story about the Taurus man who said something offensive to them or the two Aquarius guys who both cheated on her. Is the common issue with these scenarios really your perpetrators’ astrological signs, or is it just the fact that they’re all men benefiting from the patriarchy? 

The Signs as Red Flags

I am by no means completely discrediting astrology, but think back to the last time a person’s sign alone stopped you from interacting with them. Not often, right? Despite this, a person’s sign is often used as an explanation for why a relationship failed or why a man did or said something inappropriate.

It’s easy to brush off failed relationships with the explanation that a person’s astrological energy is what’s responsible for making them incompatible with you. But let’s face it: There are often deeper, more important reasons for a relationship to come to an end.

It’s worth questioning whether your discussion partner mansplained Marxist theory to you because he’s a Libra or just because he’s a man.

It’s okay to use this method in jest or as a quick coping mechanism, as long as it doesn’t get in the way of being self-aware about the mistakes that individuals make in their respective relationships. However, this line of thinking transcends the dating world and applies to friendly interactions with men as well. In these scenarios, it’s worth questioning whether your discussion partner mansplained Marxist theory to you because he’s a Libra or just because he’s a man. 

Not All Men? 

If you’re an adult woman in America, chances are you’ve had an inappropriate, sexist or even abusive experience with a man regardless of his sign. Whether it be a bad date, sexual harassment or just outright sexism, modern feminists are fighting to bring issues women face with men to light. 

These issues run deeper than at what time and in which location a man was born, and although we often make astrological generalizations about the others for fun, it’s easy to forget that there are societal implications and norms that all men — regardless of whether they are feminists or not — are guilty of upholding. 

This does not mean that all men are against gender equality or aren’t making strides in the feminist movement, but all men are often held to different standards than women. For observant women, these gender disparities can make for infuriating and blatantly unfair interactions with men. 

What About Women?

On the opposite end of the spectrum, women often applaud and praise other women in their friend groups, regardless of their signs. Have you ever had a conversation where a friend said they love all Leo women but can’t stand Leo men? The difference has nothing to do with the fact that both groups are Leos — it is, of course, the fact that many women offer their friend groups love and support, yet they have had multiple bad experiences with men. 

It would be naive to claim that all women are supportive of all other women all the time; however, in terms of astrology, many use signs as proof of the positive qualities in their female friends and of the negative qualities in their male counterparts. There is nothing wrong with telling your friends what you love about them or with calling out a man for harmful or inappropriate behavior. That being said, being aware of the true cause of these disparities does more for feminism than blaming men’s failures on their astrological signs.

Gender Equality for One and for All

The only way to reduce gender inequality is to stop blaming it on petty circumstances and blatantly address the sexism that pervades our society. 

Rather than blaming a bad date or an offensive encounter on a man’s sign, or on any other excuse for that matter, address the problem for what it is: an experience with gender inequality. Of course, not every negative experience a woman has is based on gender inequality, but it is important to analyze the reasons for negative experiences and to put an end to them. 

Astrology is fun, and, to some practitioners, a serious way to get to know other people, but it cannot continue to be an excuse for sexism. Everyone has a responsibility to blatantly call out behavior that perpetuates harmful norms and stereotypes toward women. The only way to fix this issue is to stop blaming negative experiences on other causes and start being unapologetically honest about the roots of modern issues that women face.