Published: October 22, 2009

The morning left nothing

Nothing but cold chills and dreams of the dreams dreamt a night ago

Last night tomorrow had all the promise of a Hollywood movie and forever

Wrapped in glamour and endless possibility and success and beauty and fame and perfection

Today reality knocked on the door of the honeymoon suite as first light came through the haphazardly draw shades

What a sum would be paid for every moment to be like the moment before sleep to pretend that life would never again come in and leave all in its path flattened and groping for breath

If only there was never a moment when in the dark and in bed it became obvious that there were twenty four hours to come

Twenty four hours of endless failure

Last night before these eyes treacherously woke

There was a night filled with dreams of beauty and living

Actual living not making it through the day or watching TV and the smarter funnier more attractive people live

Then morning came and reality knocked gently on the door demanding an audience

Last night there were endless oaths that tomorrow all would begin and living would no longer be a special treat reserved for dreams

Those thoughts were lustlessly agreed with as an indulgent parent to overeager children

Today is worse than every day before because every day before stretches behind like a perpetually growing endless mocking trail of less than mediocrity

And it is so so so very easy to look back and pretend it is looking forward and all those days are to come

It would be enough to lay and think of all the things life has offered that have been ignored

To pull the covers up and in that stifling cocoon let the seduction flourish into a beautiful venomous flower like a Venus flytrap or one of those huge reeking plants in the rainforest that smell of rotting meat

Reality continues to knock patiently on the door demanding to be met

It would be better if it got a stick of dynamite and blew the door down instead of waiting for it to be opened as for a welcomed guest